Get that Half-Baked Story Out of the Oven!

17 Monday Apr 2017

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Story, Writing

Tags

Am Writing, Amie Kaufman, don't give up, Elizabeth Fais, Fiction, Gemina, half baked, Illuminae, Jay Kristoff, Joss Whedon, novel, Story, writer's life, Writing, writing recipe

Writing Recipe for Success

It happens to every writer. At least once. We start a project, excited and inspired by the sparkly new idea. We run with it, fleshing out characters, working magic with dialog, setting, and plot. Then something happens. Our inspiration dissipates, like air from a hot air balloon. We’re slugging forward through molasses, when once we soared.

It’s easy to get discouraged, or possibly even give up on that great idea at this point. I’m here to tell you…

DO NOT GIVE UP!

Writing a novel is a lot like baking a cake. You carefully organize and mix the ingredients, select and prepare the pan, then put it in the oven to bake at the right temperature for the perfect amount of time. Unlike the cake, a creative oven requires our input for the heat, and the time it takes to fully bake is not always in our favor. Deadliness be damned. Unfortunately, half-baked is only half there.

The good news is that you got the story into the oven. Here’s a few strategies on how you can get it out…fully baked.

Turning Up the Heat

We get stuck in our writing for lots of reasons. The best way to get unstuck is to shake things up, take a new approach, do something totally different. The unexpected has a way of jump starting creativity. Here’s few suggestions:

Go someplace you’ve always wanted to, but haven’t. A change of scenery, especially a place that elicits intrigue, works wonders.
Watch A LOT of movies and TV shows. Joss Whedon would watch four or five movies in a row (in one day) to study story. You never know what will provide the boost you need for your story.
Read A LOT of different things, both magazines and books. Read outside your comfort zone. Change is good. Embrace it.
Talk to people who have cool jobs, or who’ve had very different life experiences than your own. This is one of the things Amie Kauffman, co-author of Illuminae and Gemina, does to get new ideas.
Go to a public place and people watch. Imagine where they’re going and what they’ll do when they get there. Have fun creating stories without the pressure of an outcome.
Start a totally different project in a completely different genre, just for you. Published authors confess to doing this when they’ve been paralyzed under a deadline. The story they started “for themselves” got them excited about writing again and they made their deadline. Those stories later became wildly popular books too. A win-win.
Brainstorm with other writers. Especially if you’re under deadline. Screenwriters work this way a lot.
Write stuff. Then write more stuff.
Fire your internal editor and keep going until you reach The End.

You’re doing great!

LOVE ~ Fiction’s Greatest Common Denominator

14 Tuesday Feb 2017

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Love, Story, Writing

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Blake Snyder, Cassandra Clare, City of Heavenly Fire, Elizabeth Fais, Fiction, Hallmark, Hamlet, Harry Potter, Hollywood, Jane Austen, Katherine Applegate, Love, Macbeth, Mortal Instruments, opera, Othello, Rom-Com, Romantic Comedy, Romeo and Juliet, Rossini, Save the Cat!, Severus Snape, Shadowhunter Chronicles, Shakespeare, The One And Only Ivan, Valentine's Day

❤️ It’s Valentine’s Day ❤️

Love is in the air, whether you adore the holiday or not.

Many bemoan the grandiose expectations the holiday puts on…well…everyone.

Don’t blame Hallmark.

Instead, look to fiction for insights into why this holiday has become a national obsession.

Love … Has Everything to Do With It

As Blake Snyder, Mr. Save the Cat!, used to say, “The motivating force of a story has to be primal.” And nothing is more primal than love. I’d go so far as to say that love is fiction’s greatest common denominator, that the roots of every story are based in love.

Whether it’s seeking love, giving love, protecting love, grieving for love, or the ugliness that springs from lack of love or unrequited love.

Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet is one of the most popular stories of all time, because it resonates with humanity’s innermost core. Love.

Love’s Joyful Eccentricities

The romantic comedy (rom-com) is the popular love story of today. Shakespeare was the first to make that particular story type popular, though. Shakespeare wrote a total of 16 romantic comedies, earning him the title as the original Rom-Com King. Rossini, and other composers, carried the romantic comedy into the opera houses with great success. Later, Hollywood was quick to spin the romantic comedy into a film genre.

In children’s literature, the net of love stretches to include other species. For example, in The One and Only Ivan, by Katherine Applegate, a young girl’s compassionate love for Ivan, the shopping mall gorilla, is the catalyst for his freedom.

Likewise, Ivan’s love for the elephants who are also trapped in the roadside shopping mall attraction sparks his imagination and fuels his actions that provide the means for the young girl to help them.

Spanning centuries, artistic mediums, and species…the love story has touched the hearts of audiences everywhere. To such a great extent, it has permeated the fabric of our consciousness. Such is the power of love. Because it’s primal.

Love’s Darker Faces

The primal motivating force of a character always comes back to love. “Even the villain?” you ask. Yes. Severus Snape, in J.K. Rowling‘s Harry Potter series, is a perfect example of denied love giving the character a villainous face.

Shakespeare’s dramatic plays reflect the darker facets of love, such as Hamlet, Macbeth, and Othello. Jane Austen, thought by many to be the Queen of Romance in fiction, touches the sadder sides of love in her works, such as Persuasion.

Cassandra Clare‘s Mortal Instruments series is woven through with characters’ experiences and expressions of the grimmer facets of love, that sometimes grow so dark as to perpetuate murder. However, the main theme revolving throughout the series is self-acceptance.

The characters come to see and understand that the choices they make and the consequences that follow are a reflection of their level of self-love. This realization leads some through their darkness, to where they can embrace the healing power of love.

Fictional Time Management & Other Relative Topics

06 Sunday Nov 2016

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Story, Writing

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Albert Einstein, Andie MacDowell, Bill Murray, clockpunk, clocks, Daylight Savings Time, Elizabeth Fais, Fantasy, Fiction, Groundhog Day, Pennsylvania, Punxsutawney, Story, Tara Sim, Theory of Relativity, time, Timekeeper, Writing, YA, Young Adult

Einstein Nailed It

When I was in grade school, my parents went away for an hour and it felt like an entire day. Seriously. Later that same year when we went to Disneyland for the first time, one day felt like a minute.

Not unlike when we set our clocks forward an hour in the spring for Daylight Savings Time, and it feels like we lose four hours of sleep instead of just one. Yet when we set our clocks back an hour in the fall, the same hour feels like it’s cut in half. What’s up with that?

Einstein’s Theory of Relativity in four words: Time is funny stuff.

The Perception of Time is Relative

We often perceive time as expanding or contracting based on our emotions, and our perception creates our reality. Authors have used this to their advantage for quite some time. Telling a story in real-time slows the pace down to focus on a character or story element, or maybe to build suspense. Writers have their ways of accelerating the pace to adjust perception and influence emotion too. Further proof that the pen, and the keyboard, are mightier than the sword. And quantum physics…apparently.

Manipulating fictional time, at its best, keeps readers turning the pages. I wrote a post on Time as a Story Element that discusses these techniques in greater detail, if you’re interested.

Lost Time: Timekeeper

What if time didn’t just expand and contract, but could actually be lost? As in disappear. Vanish. Just freaking gone.

An intriguing predicament that I hadn’t considered, until I picked up Timekeeper by Tara Sim. The first lines of this alternate Victorian era London run by clock towers cut to the chase:

Two o’clock was missing. Danny wanted it to be a joke. Hours didn’t just disappear.

But they can, and did, in a world where clock towers literally control time. When a clock tower breaks, so does time. And when a clock tower is destroyed, time stops completely. This clockpunk fantasy is infused with magic, woven through with myth, and spiced with mayhem. Danny, our hero, is a clock Mechanic charged with ensuring that time flows according to the natural order. The Mechanics inherit the job, because they can actually feel the strands of time and the weave of its fabric. The existential truths layered throughout the story provide satisfying believability and depth.

Time was everywhere and nowhere at once, making the moment last an eternity.

Stuck in Time: Groundhog Day

There is broken time, and then there is being stuck in time on infinite repeat. A post on fictional time and relativity just isn’t complete without a mention of one of my favorite movies: Groundhog Day.

Phil (Bill Murray), an egotistical curmudgeon of a weatherman, gets stuck living Groundhog Day in Punxsutawney, Pennsylvania over, and over, and over…until he finally gets it right. Which for him, takes some doing. I could go on and on and on about this movie, but you’ll enjoy watching the following trailer much more. May time forever flow in your favor.

Word Wizardry ~ The Power of Punchy Dialog

03 Monday Oct 2016

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Fiction, Television, Writing

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Allison Janney, Bradley Whitford, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, C.J. Cregg, dialog, Donna Moss, Elizabeth Fais, Fiction, Janel Moloney, Josh Lyman, Joss Whedon, Martin Sheen, President Bartlet, Rob Lowe, Sam Seaborn, Stockard Channing, Story, Television, The West Wing, Writing

Dialog molds characters into three-dimensions. What characters say, as well as what they don’t, reveals who they are. Dialog has the power to make a story and its characters memorable, whether in books, theater, film, or television. I shamelessly study any medium that’s raised the dialog bar. My current ~~obsession~~ interest is The West Wing.

The Magic of the Cutting Quip

I’m a little (?) late to the game on The West Wing (1999-2006). However, it is still in high demand on Netflix, which is a testament to its raise-the-bar quality.

The snappy dialog, and the aplomb with which it is delivered, hooked me in the first episode. Centered around the day-to-day happenings surrounding the President of the United States and his staff, The West Wing tackles serious topics without sinking into the morose. The sheer genius of the dialog and its delivery balanced intense drama with just-right humor, while revealing nuanced layers character traits.

Such as when Sam Seaborn, Deputy White House Communications Director in the administration of President Josiah “Jed” Bartlet, deflects an attack of an irate woman for his stance on school funding:

Woman: Don’t play dumb with me.
Sam: I am dumb. Most of the time I’m playing smart.

Then there were the typos in the State of the Union Address. As a writer, I may find typos funnier than most. But still. It’s The White House. Monumental decisions that affect millions of people go down there every day. So misspelled words in the State of the Union Address? Kind of (?) funny, if not a little embarrassing.

The following exchange happened during a read-through of the President’s State of the Union speech:

President: I’m proud to report our country’s stranger than it was a year ago?
Sam: Stronger. That’s a typo.
President: It could go either way.

Then later in the same episode:

First Lady: Why is hall#wed spelled with a pound sign in the middle of it?
President: I stopped asking those questions.

Dialog “Do’s” from The West Wing

Reveal personality quirks.
Josh Lyman, White House Deputy Chief of Staff, and Donna Moss, his assistant, were arguing about her not checking his lunch order to make sure his hamburger was burned-to-a-crisp. Josh elaborates, “I like my hamburger so hard that if you drop it on the floor it breaks.”
Show character strengths.
Josh threatens to fire Donna when she pushes back on a request that’s obviously not important. To which she replies, “You’ve already fired me three times. I’m impervious.” Then she walks away, declaring “Impervious.”
Expose character dynamics.
C.J. Cregg, White House Press Secretary, intentionally annoys Josh in a press briefing by saying, “…the theoretical psychics at Cal Tech Nuclear Lab… You know what? I’m pretty sure that’s supposed to be physicists.”
Engender empathy in a character.
An international incident is in play, the President suffered a medical emergency, the State of the Union Address is that evening, and everyone keeps asking him if he’s taking his medication. To ease his staff’s worry, President Bartlet responds with humor, “Is it possible I’m taking something called euthanasia?” Sam replies, “Echinacea.” The President smiles, “That sounds more like it.”
Lighten an intense scene.
Every episode of The West Wing uses witty banter to lighten intense scenes. Joss Whedon—creator of Buffy the Vampire Slayer—said it best: “Make it dark, make it grim, make it tough, but then, for the love of God, tell a joke.”

For the Love of Character ~ Idiosyncrasies that Build Empathy

09 Monday May 2016

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Character, Fiction, Story

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Brenda Leigh Johnson, Character, crime drama, Deputy Chief, FBI, Fiction, Jon Tenny, Kyra Sedgwick, LAPD, Los Angeles Police Department, Mystery, Story, The Closer, Warner Bros. Television

Building Empathy

I’ve written about various facets of character development in the past, mostly in broad-stroke terms, such as quirky characters who dress like Buster Keaton. Such extreme character traits complement some stories. Other stories require a subtler approach. Developing empathy for a character comes from seeing their idiosyncrasies and flaws, which allows us to identify with them.

Let’s face it. No one can relate to a perfect person, because we all have shortcomings of some kind. Which is why a character’s weaknesses inspire empathy, and in turn cause us to fall in love with them. A tough, no-nonsense investigator who stress eats Ding Dongs (and other sweets) becomes instantly more likable.

Creating empathy is a lot like building trust, it happens over time as we get to know the real person from the inside out.

What “The Closer” Taught Me About Character

Research for writing fiction can cover a broad gamut, including watching television. And you wonder why I love this job?

I write for young readers, and initially started watching The Closer — a Warner Bros. Televsion adult crime drama — to analyze the mystery plot structure and well planned plot twists. The series had garnered more than a few Emmy nominations, and at least one win. I figured I could learn something from the writing. I was right in more ways than anticipated. The Closer showed me the power of everyday character idiosyncrasies as a method for building empathy.

For anyone who hasn’t seen The Closer, here’s the synopsis: The Closer is a police procedural series, starring Kyra Sedgwick as Brenda Leigh Johnson, a Los Angeles Police Department Deputy Chief. Brenda moved to Los Angeles from Georgia where she trained in the CIA, and gained a reputation as a Closer — a tough interrogator who solves cases and obtains confessions leading to convictions that “close” the case. Deputy Chief Johnson uses her femininity to disarm and distract, and at times resorts to deceit and intimidation to persuade suspects into confessing.

Brenda Johnson is an expert in her field, relentless and often intimidating. As perfect as she is when it comes to succeeding at her job, her foibles make her relatable and endearing. Here are a few of her characteristics that won me over and made me root for her:

She dresses feminine and understated like the Southern girl she is, rather than embodying the high-power-business-suit-chic of the other women at her job level.
She stress eats sweets, especially Ding Dongs, which she keeps stockpiled in her desk drawer.
As powerful as she is at work, she is unable to stand up to her father whenever he comes to visit.
She has episodes of disorganized absent-mindedness where she can’t find her phone and loses her purse. Hey, we’ve all been there.
Her single-minded focus that makes her so good at her job causes friction in her personal relationships — such as her FBI boyfriend (Jon Tenny) who she eventually marries.
She has trouble dealing with simple things in everyday life, like remembering the sex of the stray cat that comes with the house she buys. Brenda calls “Kitty” a “he” even after “she” has kittens. This drives Fritz, her then boyfriend, crazy.
She is relentless in her pursuit of a criminal, creating loopholes in the system to pursue justice, even when the victims were less than noble when alive.
She uses her Southern charm to get what she wants, always ending an unpleasant request with a sweet “Thank you so much” before anyone can object.
She stands behind the people on her team, protecting their jobs during budget cuts, and refusing to believe any one of them could be the cause of the information leak in her department.

Every member of the ensemble cast received their share of idiosyncrasies that endeared them to me as well. And the final season closed with all the necessary ingredients for a satisfying ending.

Shocking! Similes Gone Wrong, Very Wrong

14 Monday Mar 2016

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in English, Humor, Writing

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

creative writing, Elizabeth Fais, English, essays, Fiction, high school, Humor, short stories, simile, Writing

A simile is a literary device used to make a comparison by showing the similarities of two different things. A simile draws a resemblance, in most cases using the words like or as, to create a direct comparison.

She swam as gracefully as a swan.
Confidence radiated off him like he owned the place, even though he was just a waiter.
Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day? Thou art more lovely and more temperate. — William Shakespeare, Sonnet 18

When used correctly, similes are a powerful descriptive tool that engages readers, encouraging the imagination. Misused, similes can be nothing short of hilarious, maybe even shocking.

High School Hilarity

In the process of cleaning out a file cabinet, I found a folder full of “funny stuff” that floated around the Internet back in the 90’s. I wish I could take credit for compiling this list of high school’s most hilarious similes, but I can’t. I don’t even know the originator, or I’d give them credit.

Each of the following similes was taken from an actual high school essay or short story, punctuation and all. What makes them so hilarious is their innocence, not their ignorance. Enjoy!

The thunder was ominous-sounding, much like the sound of a thin sheet of metal being shaken backstage during the storm scene in a play.
She caught your eye like one of those pointy hook latches that used to dangle from screen doors and would fly up whenever you banged the door open again.
The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn’t.
McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
The politician was gone but unnoticed, like the period after the Dr. on a Dr Pepper can.
Her hair glistened in the rain like nose hair after a sneeze.
John and Mary had never met. They were like two hummingbirds who had also never met.
Her vocabulary was as bad as, whatever.
The hailstones leaped from the pavement, just like maggots when you fry them in hot grease.
Her date was pleasant enough, but she knew that if her life was a movie, this guy would be buried in the credits as something like “second tall man”.
Long separated by cruel fate, the star-crossed lovers race across the grassy field toward each other like two freight trains, one having left Cleveland at 6:36 p.m. traveling at 55 mph, the other from Topeka at 4:19 p.m. at a speed of 35 mph.
His thoughts tumbled in his head, making and breaking alliances like underpants in a dryer without Cling Free.

[PC: morguefile.com]

Fiction Writing ~ Socially Acceptable Insanity

09 Wednesday Sep 2015

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Fiction, Story, Writing

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butter beer, Diagon Alley, Elizabeth Fais, Fiction, Genovia, Hogwarts, J.K. Rowling, Judy Blume, Meg Cabot, Ray Bradbury, Reading, SCBWI, Story, suspension of disbelief, Universal Studios, Wizarding World of Harry Potter, Writing

Kidding … But Only Just

A while back I tweeted, “Fiction writing is a socially acceptable form of insanity.” I was only half-joking, and was surprised by how many people seemed to agree with me. Later I discovered that some famous authors gave credence to that view also.

J.K. Rowling said that she is “perfectly happy sitting alone in a room, making things up in her head all day.” We applaud her because she’s written stories many of us hold dear. If a non-writer type person made the same statement, we’d worry for them.

Then there’s Ray Bradbury, who said pretty much the same thing:

Keeping It Real

When fiction is done well, readers suspend disbelief, their world drops away, and the story becomes real…the characters, the setting, everything about the time and place. For an author to create a story that convincing, the world and characters have to become real for them as well. As Robert Frost said:

No tears in the writer, no tears in the reader. No surprise in the writer, no surprise in the reader.

At a Society of Children’s Book Writers and Illustrators (SCBWI) Summer Conference a few years back, Judy Blume made a surprise appearance and added one better to Robert Frost’s quote:

“If the author isn’t turned on when writing a love scene, the reader won’t be turned on either.”

The audience hooted, because it’s so true. If you don’t feel the spark when you’re writing a scene, the reader won’t feel it either.

The same standard of realness holds true for any art form, if it is to emotionally move its audience … whether it’s music, the visual or performing arts. To transmit a feeling through their work, the artist must delve into the emotion. One glance at the statue in this image, and it’s obvious the sculptor felt love on a deep, spiritual level. [PC: morguefile.com]

Reading ~ Socially Acceptable Psychosis

I came across the following description of reading and laughed out loud, because it’s a perfect match for psychosis:

…staring at marked slices of trees and hallucinating vividly for hours on end.

When fiction is done right, this is the effect is has on the reader. We become so fully engaged in the story…everything about it becomes real.

The reality a story creates doesn’t cease when a book is finished…for the reader or the writer. The story and its characters take on a life of their own. So much so, that many of us wish fictional characters Happy Birthday on social media (you know you do too, admit it).

The world the characters inhabit becomes equally real. Why else would thousands of people trek to Universal Studios’ Wizarding World of Harry Potter, in Orlando (and soon in Los Angeles) to visit Hogwarts, Diagon Alley, and drink butter beer? Because that world is real to those who love those books.

Meg Cabot recently tweeted about actually googling the weather in Genovia (Princess Mia’s country). I love this. I can so totally relate, after having read the entire Princess Diaries series. This is fiction done right!

The Illusive “Voice” ~ What Editors and Agents Want & Writers Seek

20 Monday Apr 2015

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Character, Fiction, Writing

≈ 9 Comments

Tags

Character, Elizabeth Fais, Fiction, Kathleen Applegate, Meg Cabot, Rachel Hawkins, Rebel Belle, The One And Only Ivan, The Princess Diaries, Voice, Writing

At my first writing conference several years ago, editors and agents told the crowded room of enthusiastic writers that they were looking for “a unique voice”. I had no idea what that meant.

My response: “What the heck is that, and how to I get one?”

Luckily, I had enough sense not to say that out loud. Instead, I kept writing and going to conferences, and eventually I found my “voice”.

If you’ve been writing fiction for some time, you’ve most likely developed your unique voice. This post is for anyone in the early stages of their writing journey, and are too shy to ask, “what the heck is voice?”

What is “Voice” anyway?

Voice, quite simply, is character and personality.

Voice is the rhythm, tempo, and style that sparks with originality, and projects emotion and tone. Voice blends the personality of the writer with that of the characters in a story.

“What’s so hard about that?” I just have to be myself,” you might be thinking.

True. But in good fiction, characters, events, emotions, and voice need to be larger than life. Translating personality onto the page in a way that is authentic and brings characters to life, can an obscure path to navigate. Trust me on this.

I don’t know about you, but talking about concepts only takes me so far. I need examples to ground ideas in something practical. The following examples of voice are in the first person, so the personality (voice) is easier to ascertain. Third person and omniscient points of view also have distinctive voices, but we’ll save that for another time.

The Princess Diaries

The book series was as popular as the movies, because of the unique voice Meg Cabot brings to her characters. Mia may be a princess, but her voice is that of a quirky, insecure, and slightly irreverent teenager. If you haven’t read the series, it’s a must for character study and voice.

But a PRINCE? Of a whole COUNTRY? I mean, I knew Dad was in politics, and of course I knew he had money–how many kids at my school have summer homes in France? Martha’s Vineyard, maybe, but not France.

So what I want to know is, if my dad’s an actual prince, how come I have to learn Algebra? I mean, seriously.

The One and Only Ivan

Katherine Applegate uses the voice of Ivan to tell his heartfelt story. Ivan’s honest simplicity pulls us close and holds us there. Ivan is as believable (as a narrator) as his voice is unique.

I am Ivan. I am a gorilla.

It’s not as easy as it looks.

People call me the Freeway Gorilla. The Ape at Exit 8. The One and Only Ivan, Mighty Silverback.

The names are mine. But they are not me. I am Ivan, just Ivan, only Ivan.

Rebel Belle

Rachel Hawkins infuses Southern charm and etiquette in the voice of her characters, in this fun and quirky, kick-butt tale.

Now this is when it really gets weird. I know, I know, dead janitor in disguise, killer history teacher, how much weirder could it get?

Lots. Trust me.

When Dr. DuPont put that sword–well, scimitar–on my neck, I didn’t feel scared, like, at all. Instead, I felt that tingle in my chest again, only this time, it was more like this … energy. …

I didn’t knee him in the groin, although I didn’t rule that move out. Instead I … ugh, this is so embarrassing.

I head-butted him.

I know, like a soccer hooligan or something.

How do you find your voice?

You may be thinking, “Wow, those are great examples. But how do I find my voice?”

It’s a simple, but not quick. Don’t hate me:

Read. Read. Read, and read some more.

Read everything in your genre, then read authors in other genres. When you find an author whose style resonates with you, read everything they’ve ever written. Then read those books again. By reading and rereading their words, you absorb the rhythm and style of the prose. It’s learning through osmosis.

Voice isn’t a static thing, though. It’s a quality that evolves with the author, as they hone and polish their craft. That’s what’s so wonderful about writing. It’s not a static process. There’s always room for growth, for improvement.

Which author’s voice resonates with you?

“The Santa Drag” ~ This Santa has a secret only true love can reveal!

28 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by Elizabeth Fais in Fiction, Rom-Com, Romance

≈ 5 Comments

Tags

Christmas, Fiction, Holiday, Liv Rancourt, Romance, Romantic Comedy, Santa, Short Story, The Santa Drag

This season the biggest surprise isn’t under the tree…

Mackenzie’s an out-of-work actress who takes a job as a shopping mall Santa to pay the rent. She fools everyone with her Santa drag, until the day Joe McBride walks into the mall. Joseph Timothy McBride – the real-life, got a soap opera gig and you saw him in Scream II actor. The only guy she ever really loved.

Can Mack stay in character, or is it time to strip off the red coat and peel off the beard for good?

The Santa Drag is a 6,000 word short story about a Santa with a secret, stressed out parents in the mall, and one very handsome actor.

Black Friday FREEBIE! ~ Nov. 28-30

Don’t miss out on this delicious holiday treat! From 11/28 – 11/30/14, The Santa Drag is FREE from Amazon [Kindle Edition]!

Reviewers have called this story charming and funny. Want a quick holiday pick-me-up? Get it here with one-click: The Santa Drag.

The Santa Drag is available exclusively from Amazon [Kindle Edition]. After November 30th, you can buy it here.

Read an Excerpt:

A kid in my lap threatened to throw up, taking my full attention for several moments, and when I looked up again it was Joe’s turn. Maya gave him a way-too-friendly smile, which he returned with his standard, ‘yep, I’m handsome,’ grin. His kids stood behind him. The boy clearly thought he was too old for all this nonsense, and his sister was trapped in between the excitement of seeing Santa and her brother’s ennui.

“Come on, guys,” Joe said, tugging the boy forward with an arm around the shoulders. I paid strict attention to the kids. I did not want to look at his face or see the dimple in his chin. He turned around to say something to Maya. I really didn’t want to look at his ass.

“Uncle Joe, this is so stupid,” the boy said. Uncle Joe. I almost jumped out of my chair. They must be his sister Kelly’s kids.

“Get over there, Saxton. We’re taking pictures for your mother’s Christmas present. Mabyn, you too.” Joe pushed his nephew in my direction. Saxton and Mabyn? Wow, Kelly must be seriously into her Irish heritage. Or something.

Saxton was dressed in a red and green striped soccer jersey and jeans, his longish brown hair slicked back behind his ears. Mabyn wore a green sweater and jeans, with her hair pulled back in a thick red braid. Joe had jeans on, too. I tried really hard not to notice how well they fit across his thighs.

“Uncle Joe, will you get us some ice cream after this?” Mabyn asked.

“If you smile pretty for the camera.” Joe gave her a shadow of the grin that I remembered. She gave him a pretty decent grin in return, though her big front teeth overlapped and there was a gap where one eye tooth should have been. Braces must be coming soon.

“She wishes she could smile pretty,” Saxton sneered. Mabyn smacked him on the arm. “Ow, she hit me. She should get in trouble.”

I would have hit him harder.

With Joe standing so close, it was hard to remember that I was supposed to be Santa. I gave a half-assed “Ho-ho-ho,” which sounded strangled, even to me. He glanced over at me, and I accidentally met his eyes. I looked away immediately, but not before I saw the flash. Not recognition, exactly, but interest. I could feel him watching me. “Ho-ho-ho.” It came out heartier this time. I was so not going to give myself away.

Meet Liv:

I write romance: m/f, m/m, and v/h, where the h is for human and the v is for vampire…or sometimes demon. I write funny. I don’t write angst. When I’m not writing I take care of tiny premature babies or teenagers, depending on whether I’m at home or at work. My husband is a soul of patience, my dog is the cutest thing evah(!), and we’re up to three ferrets.

I can be found on-line at all hours of the day and night: